quicksand

i feel like im stuck
in a never ending battle with myself
holding on to things and feelings that are bad for me
i see myself starring at a mirror yet all i see is sadness
this pool of dispear has swallowed me whole
these tears keep coming
all the tissues clutter on the floor
empty and dried with reminders of my pain
how could i continue to suffer and drown on my own
i scream yet no one hears me
cry yet no one wipes the tears away
in agony yet no one heals this pain within
the past has engulfed me in sweet misery
yet i remain loyal to the past
hoping that one day it will come back to reality
hoping and hoping
yet nothing comes back
everything moves on as i stand in quicksand
trying to reach out to a branch or two
yet nothing rescues me from where i stand
quicksand.... im slowly spiraling down
what can i do to keep moving forward
what can i say to heal this pain that has torn my heart in pieces
nothing.....
quick sand has engulfed me mind heart body and soul

when a girl cries

Are You Afraid To Love Her?
(When you come on home and sit quietly in the dark)
You Woke Up in bed with another
(you looked all right and you constantly played with her heart)
Your never there to hold her
(She lays alone and pleases herself at night)
Why Cant You See Shes Urning For Your Attention But You Rather Make Her Cry


It Wont Be To Long Before She Cries Out all her Tears
Then you will be all alone


Cuz When A Girl Cries
Her Tears Never Lie
Maybe She Wants You Outta Her Life
Or Maybe She Hides What She Feels Inside
It Hurts So Bad She Feels Like She Could Die
But When A Girl Cries If Theres A Smile
Maybe She Wants You To Stay In Her Life
Cuz When A Girl Cries You Must Decide Are You Really Treating Her Right? When A Girl Cries


Are You Afraid Of One Love?
(You Keep Plenty Around But They Dont Mean Nothing No)
Shes Missing Your Love And Affection
(Staying Nights On The Town With Some Help From The Other Homes)
OO Nikka What You Be Thinking
(You Know She Holds You Down)
Why Arent You Willing To Make It Last
Its A Major Mistake You Making
(You Know Shes The One)
But Your Ganna Let Her Pass
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com


It Wont Be To Long Before She Cries Out all her Tears
Then you will be all alone

Cuz When A Girl Cries
Her Tears Never Lie
Maybe She Wants You Outta Her Life
Or Maybe She Hides What She Feels Inside
It Hurts So Bad She Feels Like She Could Die
But When A Girl Cries If Theres A Smile
Maybe She Wants You To Stay In Her Life
Cuz When A Girl Cries You Must Decide Are You Really Treating Her Right? Cuz When A Girl Cries




She Might Be The Most Important Part Of Your Life But You Cant Even See It Cuz You Aint Treating Her RightYou Needa Treat Her Better You Needa Treat Her Sweeter You Need To Hold On To Her Cuz When A Girl Cries


Cuz When A Girl Cries
Her Tears Never Lie
Maybe She Wants You Outta Her Life
Or Maybe She Hides What She Feels Inside
It Hurts So Bad She Feels Like She Could Die
But When A Girl Cries If Theres A Smile
Maybe She Wants You To Stay In Her Life
Cuz When A Girl Cries You Must Decide Are You Really Treating Her Right? When A Girl Cries

love by keyshia cole

I used to think that I wasn't fine enough
And I used to think that I wasn't wild enough
But I won't waste my time tryin' to figure, out
why you playing games, whats this all about
And I can't believe,
Your hurting me
I met your girl, what a difference
What you see in her
You aint see in me
But I guess it was all just make-believe

[Chorus]

Oh, Love
never knew what I was missing
but I knew once we started kissin'
I found......
Love
never knew what I was missin'
but I knew once we start kissin'
I found.....

[Verse 2]

Now you're gone, what am I gonna do
I'm so oo empty
my heart, my soul can't go on
Go on baby without you....
My rainy days fade away when you,
come around please tell me baby
why you go so far away
Why you go...

[Chorus]

Love......
never knew what I was missing
but I knew once we started kissin'
I found......
Love
never knew what I was missin'
but I knew once we start kissin'
I found.....

I found you
yeaaahhhh
oooooo

Now you're gone, what am I gonna do
I'm so oo empty
my heart, my soul can't go on
Go on baby without you....
Rainy days fade away
when you come around
say your here to stay
With me boy
I don't want you to leave me
I need you......

thickness...

so i was looking threw my old pics and damn i was so tiny! i miss my 130s and ish i weigh well im not gunna say im thick hubby loves it i dont he says he thinks its impossible for me to get back into my normal body weight ever since i started those meds for fibromyalgia my weight has shot up like crazy and im not crazy about that. so i did some looking around and imma start that quicktrim diet from the kardashians. me and my friend desha are gunna try it. wish us luck! i hope to be back in the 130s by the summer. i wanna be able to wear my two piece bathing suits without feeling so darn insecure.

so far my day is blah...just channel surfing dont know wat to watch.... got to speak to one of my cuzins wow time flies its like we all grown and ish....its crazy....

well thats about it till i feel inspired to write some spoken word

laters

omg tell me he aint sexy i love him more than marc anthony dead ass his music is sooo ughhh me muerroooo just had to blog him mmmmm *melts

update!

so for the past week ive been overwhelmed with so many emotions and things going on in my life i thought my blog omg i completely neglected it! first off imma say i apologize. imma be writting a whole lot more. i will be taking some photography that i will also be posting up....i so need a nikon exclusive photography camera *sigh* i did some modeling but im still waiting for the pictures from the photographers ugh so yeah im on a mission to lose 20 lbs. i got diagnosed with fibromyalgia if u dont know wat it is look it up!!! its very common i have a few friends that have it already. if u like what u reading on here please follow me on twitter.com/dementedlee. so yeah my kids are so growing up so fast. so now i have more time to sit and write!!! im excited to see what my brain will come up with next. i have alot of swagger jockers lmaoo @ them sorry booboo u cant be like me!! who wants to write about stuff u can read in a magazine seriously get real! just had to put that out there *clears throat* oh my bipolarness has been under control!! woohooo...been partying like crazy with my bestie i love her like a sister. also i refuse to patch things up with my family aka parents they have betrayed me in the worst way possible and kept it from me they are so beyond grimey ugh i cant stand em. oh wells fuck em!!! what doesnt kill u makes u stronger. okay so stay tuned to tons of more poems photography etc!! i also have tumblr acct u can hit up my twitter and ask for it okay thats all for now bye bye

spinning...

she loves me...
she loves me not....
she wants me...
she wants me not....
sometimes i feel caught up in her web of lies and deceit
how did i get myself involved again
i have to get myself out of this before i go insane
slipping into this pool of tears
this sick hold and power she has over my heart
now i must be strong and break free
what doesnt work now wont ever work ever
i have to learn that the hard way
everything gets thrown in my face
they say im tripping
they say im insane
they say why bother when u have a wonderful man
they are all right
but i cant help the way that i feel
ive been this way for so many years
hard to change the roots of a tree when its been in growing like this for so many years
yet im removing the roots that dont work
that are severely damaged
ive woken up
realized no one can love me the way my kids and my husband can love me
but ill be forever apart of her ....